You need wins to be happy
In his book “12 Rules for Life”, Dr. Jordan B. Peterson talks about the lobster's brain and how their behavior is shaped by their confronts with other lobsters. When a lobster loses a fight, it’s dopamine and serotonin levels will drop, and the animal will literally starting bending over and walking with a really bad posture as opposed to the winning one that will have his serotonin and dopamine levels raised.
These are the core brain chemicals responsible for our happiness.
“COLLABORATION AND COMPETITION ARE THE SAME HORMONE: TESTOSTERONE. THERE’S NO SUCH THING AS COLLABORATING WITHOUT COMPETITION IN THE REAL WORLD. TO COMPETE DOES NOT MEAN TO CHEAT OR BREAK THE RULES, IT MEANS TO GO HEAD-TO-HEAD AND BE BETTER THAN YOUR OPPONENT. CERTAINLY INSIDE A CORPORATION PEOPLE NEED TO COLLABORATE FOR THE CORPORATION TO BE COMPETITIVE.”
Most males live in the low spectrum of the social hierarchy, they have low confidence, bodies out of shape, little to no money and lack of independence. Inevitably their confidence and energy level are low, they haven’t faced any challenge in life or accomplish anything and they hold themselves low in their own head and the problem with this is that you can’t out-think all of your problems and action is sometimes the only solution.
The Solution
Take small wins, eat a healthier breakfast, put on your shoes and go for a walk, read a motivational book or article.
You need to start small and gain momentum in order to keep the ball rolling, the human brain needs to feel it’s winning in order to re-adjust and take on bigger challenges.
You need to take action to move in the social hierarchy and perceive yourself as a more capable human being and to unlock, in some sense, better rewards.
Action is the antidote to depression and it is hard to take action when you’re feeling low but you really have to trick your brain here into getting started.
As you rise in the social hierarchy you’ll be perceived as a more valuable person and not only you’ll feel better and more confident and comfortable in your own skin but that’s also when the Pygmalion effect will start to do his thing. For those who don’t know the Pygmalion effect state that other expectations of you will actually improve your performance in any given area, it seems like a hard pill to swallow but I can see how it makes sense and how it has actually influenced me positively in school and other areas of my life.
Both the good and the bad times will eventually fade, nothing lasts forever, so make sure you grow when “Winter” comes around and have faith that the sun will rise again and make sure that you come back a better version of yourself.
